Will Power

When I was a girl, I knew an old woman.

She had a magic.

A way of knowing.

The strength of a person’s will.

She was quiet.  She watched.  She listened.  She smiled.

Privately, she would give me summation.

Weak willed.  Strong willed.  Willful.  With or without will power.

I would like to say she didn’t judge.  It sounds nicer.  But she did.

She didn’t dismiss the weak of will, but she did not trust them.

They had not the power to assert sheer force of will in their own lives.

How would they behave in hers?

Without honor.

I loved her but thought this mean spirited.

I told her so.

I told her everything.

“I ain’t scared a you.”

She loved to hear me say that.

It was our joke.

She adored me.

She trained me.

“The worst thing you can do to a child is break their will.”

She was right.  Of course.

Once stolen, no one can give it back to you.

Build yours again.

Have courage.

Be who you are.

Or better still…

Be who you want to be.


Manipura : Chakra Healing

Activate Your Manipura Chakra : Activate Your Will


S. Conde






You Are What You Think

…and I mean that literally.

It has been well known in certain ancient traditions that what a person thinks and says, especially repeatedly, are of the utmost importance. These thoughts and words become actions, evident in what a person does, reflected ultimately in the reality a person creates. When I was 19, the Jamaican singer, Marcia Griffiths, summed it up for me beautifully in casual conversation, “…be careful what you say.  Your words take wings and fly off into reality.”

Sophie, the main character in my book, “The Red Speck” is ill.  She has become infected by negative perceptions of herself.  As children we are particularly susceptible to the thoughts of others, their perception of who we are, and the nature of “reality” itself.  We incorporate this information into who we think we are, into our version of reality, because after all they (the adults) are the authority, they know best.

Once we mature, we become the sum total of what we think.  Hopefully, as children we were nurtured and fed positive images of ourselves, but what if that was not the case?  What if the foundation on which you were built is shaky, riddled with negativity, and self doubt?

It is my opinion, that a transformation must occur in order to return to our authentic selves.  We must be rebuilt, with a strong foundation capable of supporting who we really are, who we strive to be.

This difficult, painful, and long journey is the journey taken by Sophie.  She must go back and repair before she can move forward, before she can become Sophia. Why is the rebuilding of who we are so difficult?  Many of us know something is off in our lives.  Maybe we are addicted to a behavior of some sort, depressed, or just generally unhappy.  Maybe it’s less obvious, perhaps we experience the feeling of a void in the pit of our stomach or in our hearts and try to fill it, with shopping, eating, whatever.  If we know something is wrong why can’t we just fix it?  The good news is that we can.  The answer to the difficulty of fixing it, I believe, lies within the way our brain functions, specifically in neural pathways.

When we have a thought which becomes a repeated action a neural pathway is formed, through which information travels from one section of the brain to another.  The more you think the thought the stronger the connection grows until what was once barely a footpath becomes an interstate highway.  In order to stop traveling that path, a new one must be formed, and it is formed in the same way as the old one, through repetition.  Initially your thoughts will want to continue along the highway, because it’s so well established and easy to access, whereas the new path is completely overgrown.  Your new positive thinking, armed only with a machete is trying to hack through the bush, creating a new way.  Your new thinking will succeed, IF you keep at it.  Studies say it takes 30 to 60 days to create a new neural pathway.  This process is called neuroplasticity.  Once again, science “proves” what ancient wisdom already knew to be true.

Our protagonist Sophie, uses a set of metaphysical, yogic and chakra based tools to rebuild herself starting at the foundation of her being and working her way up.  Though never specifically mentioned until the end of the book, the reader with even basic knowledge of these traditions will understand “The Red Speck” on more than one level.

Personally, I have found Hatha yoga and chakra meditation to be invaluable in clearing out the overgrowth of my mind, and creating new thinking, on the road back home to myself.  It is my most sincere desire that “The Red Speck” is helpful to you in navigating your way back home.

S. Conde

The Accessibility of Truth : Part Two

The woman returned to the humble task of folding napkins.

“If I were my mother…”, said the woman, “…I’d be ironing them.”

The girl smiled, finishing up her biscuit and gently wiping her mouth with the linen napkin before setting it down on the table next to her plate.  Her hands folded under her chin, and elbows on the table, she leaned forward.  The woman took it as a sign to continue.

“Just because these truths, or bits of information are lost, doesn’t mean they’re gone for good, or inaccessible to us as humans.  It just means that they’re more difficult to access.”

The woman picked up the pile of freshly laundered and folded white napkins and walked back into the kitchen.  She placed them neatly in a drawer then returned to the table for the girl’s plate.

“Think of a black hole not as a bottomless pit of darkness, but as an opening in the material world.”, she said as she rinsed the plate and put it in the dishwasher.

“It sucks up light, information, and shoots it out into an alternate world on the other end of the black hole.” She said as she again wiped her hands on her apron and sat back down in her chair at the table.

“Like a hose.”, said the girl tentatively.

“Yes…”, smiled the woman, “…very much like a hose.”  The girl was encouraged.

“Physically going there and retrieving the information is…”

“Impossible!”, interrupted the girl.

The woman winked, “Improbable.”

“However, we can access that world, and others, by tapping into the black hole within us, that is us.”, she said repeatedly pressing her hand over her heart in emphasis.

The girl’s brow wrinkled again.  They woman laughed lovingly.

“Energy from the Earth rises up within us, spiraling its way up through our bodies, awakening sacred energies that have always existed within us, but that reason will not allow us to see. This energy travels up through a series of electrical pathways finally igniting our mind and opening our eyes to that which can not be see mechanically.”

The woman reached for the pitcher to pour herself a glass of tea.

“Reason…”, sighed the woman as she lifted the pitcher, “…is the enemy of the improbable, trying at every turn to defeat the delicate and fleeting world of possibility.”

The girl smiled.  She liked the sound of that.  It was true, of course, but she liked how the words sounded. Like something monks might chant in a lost language.

The girl leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes.  “What about from above?”, said the girl with her eyes still closed, “What about from the heavens?”

Good, thought the woman.  “Yes, the energy flows downward as well.”  The girl smiled, pleased with herself.

“Energy…”, continued the woman, “…information, then flows freely from one dimension to the next, and the lost truths become accessible again.  There are as many ways to accomplish this as there are souls on the planet.  Some arrive through meditation, others prayer,  even a shock to the system can be an awakening of energies.  …some unique souls never lost the truths.  The soft spot on their head never hardened fully, blocking out the flow.”

The girl opened her eyes.  “Really?”


The girl raised a disapproving eyebrow at the woman and leaned back in her chair again closing her eyes.  The woman laughed…as did the girl.